. . . and my rhetoric is not “how the fuck do you pronounce that?”
It’s “why can’t you mind your own damn business, you nasty, officious, grasping little nanny-state twit?”
See, Brian Schoenjahn wants to jump on the moronic anti-Four-Loko-panic bandwagon and pass a law that would make it a misdemeanor in Iowa for any business with a liquor license to sell nearly any drink that includes both caffeine and alcohol. Irish coffee? Illegal. Kahlua? Illegal. Black Russian? Illegal. Pour one, and your Iowan bartender is looking at up to 30 days in jail.
Available press reports do not make it clear whether Brian Schoenjahn (1) only wanted to ban caffeine-enhanced canned drinks marketed to younger people like Four Loko, but was too stupid to draft a bill tailored to that end without outlawing a vast swath of traditional alcoholic beverages and cocktails, or (2) genuinely believes that it’s the rightful place of state government to ban Irish Coffee and Kahlua because Iowans are too stupid to drink it responsibly.
Meanwhile, please remember that thoughtful and important people want you to know that libertarianism is a fringe belief and that legislators are just regular folks whose service ought to be respected.